3.5.09

I learned something very important today about complaining. Sometimes complaining seems that it cannot be avoided; stress and tension cause the mind to want to vent in some way. However, after venting today, I did feel somewhat more relaxed, but not justified.

Complaining, I think, only helps us to forget that it is the Lord who will see us through our trials, challenges, and temptations. He knows us perfectly: our talents, capabilities, situations, and doubts. I do not believe that we are given opportunities in order to fail. Even if those opportunities do not turn out the way we had anticipated, personal progression is not dependent on our own expectations when it comes to opportunities. Personal progression comes in faith and faith comes in knowing and believing that the Lord can and will make us equal to the task and then acting in accordance to that knowledge and belief. When I complained today, my belief that the Lord could make me equal to the task was not affected. However, by complaining I was doubting whether He actually had or would. I was trying to justify the hardship of my own attempts to control my situation, forgetting that it is my Lord who controls the situation and that He will see me through whatever task, be it seemingly easy or impossible.

As I look back at what I was complaining about, I realize that the Lord actually did make me able; He helped me every step of the way and made me equal to the task. And not only did He help me get things done, He gave me excellent, edifying educational experiences in the process. My mind should not be lingering on complaints; I should look back with extreme gratitude and amazement. I should look back and be able to strengthen my faith because of what the Lord helped me to accomplish. My trust in Him should now grow because of the fresh example that with His divine help, I can accomplish whatever should be His will. Complaining, I think, has the opposite effect: it has caused me to doubt my abilities and talents, to call them my own, and to fear future challenges. I would not have this be my mindset; it has only the power to cause doubt and fear.

In the future I will try to remember this better. I will remember that complaining does not edify, but its cursing is twofold: not recognizing the Lord's hand and not believing in His promises. I will remember that faith is not just believing that the Lord can, but that He will make me equal to the task. Beautiful and mysterious are His ways and who am I to question even the most difficult of challenges? In the future, I will try to remember not to complain and to think of faith instead of conceding even to the temptation and thought of complaining. Glory be to our Lord and the path He has chosen for me; I know He will see me through. May He keep us in our efforts to remember; may He keep us in our efforts to see His wisdom in all things and not forget ourselves unto temptations.